Post, Miss Poste

March 01, 2018 by Daniel Kerr

So, here’s the other big thing going on. It’s taken two weeks, 6-7 hours a day, to get us here. First thing was to get the basic idea sketched out from what the principal and his assistant gave me. (I love the crayon, btw.) Then I got graph paper and drew it out more precisely. Then I broke out my level and meter stick and drew a guideline six feet high, because that’s about where the principal wanted the lowest point. Once I had that line I could transfer coordinates from the graph to the wall and tape a curve connecting them. All of that took me three days.

And when I came in Thursday, I got to redo everything because the blue tape didn't stick.

Frog Tape. It cannot be beat. It gives fantastic lines and it stays on the wall. Sorry 3M, but I just cannot use your Edge Lock tape any longer. Frog Tape 4 life, yo.

Click the arrow to scroll

So yeah, Thursday was spent picking up all the blue tape and redoing everything, and also having a cuppa tea, some biscuits, and a nice sit-down because the YMCA basketball kids were in there for an hour. I needed it that day, too. But Friday -- Friday I got paint on the wall! Well, okay, primer. But it still felt like I was getting somewhere.

Ironically though I kind of didn't, because the yellow needed 3 coats anyway. Hey, at least I've learned for the other side. So the first picture below is Friday the 16th, and then we start to see some real progress in the next week.

The principal changed his mind several times on the details. If you go back to picture #1 you can see some of the rewrites. Initially he told me that he wanted between eight and fifteen inches of variation in the yellow (which I painted first because there is no way it's covering the blue). I actually went beyond those bounds, varying between six and eighteen inches to give it (I thought) a better look. I wasn't worried about him complaining because he gave me a lot of creative license. Turns out I didn't go far enough, because twice he asked me to widen the yellow in the widest parts. Which of course I did; it's his wall, he should get what he wants.

The downside is that my carefully planned blue wave did not come out the way I wanted. If you go back to the first gallery, you can see the sort of sine wave I tried to get in pic #2. I wanted it to start small and increase over time and that's how I roughly mapped it out. No I didn't use a calculator (though I did seriously consider it) and no I'm not certain that "sine" is the correct function. All of that is a couple decades in my past. The point is that I made that curve real pretty and then based the yellow off of it. And "the boss" wanted wider yellow, and ain't no way I'm getting a taller ladder and redoing the top of it, so I brought it down and taped off the blue much lower and I'm still not happy with that curve but I'm not going to try doing it over, I'm not obsessed.

I'm not obsessed.

Oh also before I did the blue I painted the base brown, which I did so that I could tape over that and get a real crisp line between the base and the wall. It worked amazingly well, and you can see it in the final image of gallery 2.

So yeah, I started the blue Friday the 23rd and finished it Monday the 26th. And then Tuesday the Fire & Safety Shop grabbed me to do some urgent stuff for them so I didn't even get to see the staff's reaction. (And I'm certainly not saying that Tatyana should give Bill a hard time about it when she reads this. I would never suggest that she, oh I don't know, put toner in his coffee, or plead with Baba Yaga to give him boils or something.)

Tatyana works in the front office and the whole place would fall apart without her. She and her husband are from Ukraine and I tell her about the fun Slavic stories I hear on the Myths and Legends podcast, and she teaches me a few words in Russian and pesters me to write a book. I work with some awesome people. Happy Thursday, all.

Here I rest, where disappointment and regret collide, lying awake at night.

We've had one winter, yes. What about second winter?

February 25, 2018 by Daniel Kerr

In early February we had unseasonably warm weather. I'm certain that this is a completely normal part of Earth's climate cycle and that it has nothing to do with man's ever-increasing use of fossil fuels, nor the methane generated by our farming and food consumption, nor is there any possible solution to this thing that isn't really a problem

I'd say I was turning off my sarcasm now but I don't think I have that mode. Maybe in the next firmware update?

Anyway, winter returned in full force toward the month's end.

I'm pretty sure this snow is giving me the finger.

In full force.

The second picture was taken literally 30 seconds after the first. That's how much snow was on my work van Thursday afternoon. And we got more snow over the weekend. We went from high temperatures in the 50s down to the 30s in a week. So many people were excited about getting their houses painted and flowers planted. Silly, silly people.

It's not just them, it's the stores too. We're already seeing BBQ grills, awnings, outdoor furniture...

*Shrug*

Also there's this weird phenomenon where the grocery and craft stores jumped straight from V-Day to Easter. I mean, I get that St. Patrick's day doesn't emphasize the mating and breeding aspects of the other two holidays, but the expected drunken revelry has got to lead to some of that behavior. Regardless, I'm excited to see what kind of display my glitter spiders will put on.

Other than that it's been more of the same. I picked up some nice shirts to go with my vest. I haven't tried them on yet, but that will be coming shortly. Also a pair of pants that I think will go well. Plus, my parents have my maternal grandfather's pipe collection, and they're sending me a couple which I think will be smashing additions to the look. Now I just need a nice set of shoes and spats to round it all out.

On a separate note, I think Amazon Prime has been a bad influence on me. I've ordered a bunch of stuff that I've wanted for a while but haven't found for a price I'm willing to pay. New struts for my tailgate, a wine rack for my Torani syrups, and a new TV. For a while now mine has been flaking on me and it's getting worse. Sometimes when I turn it on no picture appears, so I have to turn it back off, wait 30 seconds, and turn it back on. And a couple of times I've had to do it twice (or even thrice). (That word's for you, Tatyana. :p ) The new one should have better sound and picture and only weighs around 16 lbs. Also also, the 2005 series of Doctor Who is on Prime, and it's really cutting into my Netflix time.

I'm also spending a frustrating amount of time trying to get this site to look the way I want, to no effect. So I'm taking a break for a couple of days. Hopefully it will be super easy next go around.

And finally, this is a thing:

Yep, I've created a personal logo/brand. I have no idea what I need to do to register it or whatever to legally make it mine, but there's little chance of anyone try to steal it out from under me before I sort it out.

So that's it for this update. Be good to each other, folks. Oh and also I'm making links for my finishing quotes so if you don't recognize it, you don't have to go to all the time and hassle of a Google search. Muchas smooches.

"You know, I used to think it was awful that life was so unfair. Then I thought, wouldn't it be much worse if life were fair, and all the terrible things that happen to us come because we actually deserve them?

Overdue update (now with 50% more facial hair)

February 19, 2018 by Daniel Kerr

I'm making myself write this. Not because I don't want to but because I have so many irons in the fire.

So. Those of you who follow me on Facebook (which I'm pretty sure is all of my readers at this point) may remember that back in November 2017 I shared how suicidal I felt. I reached out in desperation, and many hands touched mine to pull me back from the brink of that abyss. Thanks to you all. <3

On November 3 my doctor told me about a new DNA test that helped match a person with the best anti-depressant for them. Four vigorous cheek swabs and six weeks later, the results came back and she prescribed me Trazodone, which was the best fit for me and the only "tier 1" drug. The others I'd tried were "tier 2." There was also "tier 3," which listed the medications that were least likely to help me/most likely to produce negative side-effects. It took another six weeks for it to fully build up in my system, but now I feel how I think normal people feel.

Clinical depression is an issue I've had since puberty. It saps my energy and my desire to do things. Alongside that, I have until recently been interested in national and world politics and events. Those two things combined just devoured my energy. Add the increased selling of our government to corporate interests, plus knowing that almost half of American voters chose a racist narcissist con man to lead the country, sapped my will to live. We had literal Nazis marching in the streets of Washington DC after the election and most people's response seemed to be *shrug*. It infuriated me and there was nothing I could do about it. It felt like the only reasonable response to this crazy merry-go-round was to get off the ride altogether. But, as I mentioned before, y'all helped me get back on that unicorn for another rotation.

Not a merry-go-round unicorn, but you get the idea.

So I kept on living through Thanksgiving, when I took a cruise with my parents to The Bahamas and Key West. For three days we were out of cell reception. No Internet. No Facebook. No news of any kind whatsoever.

It was glorious.

It was also difficult for me that first couple of days. Nassau is a gorgeous city on a gorgeous island, but it was hard for me to reconcile that beauty with the knowledge of how western Europeans had pillaged the Americas and raped, murdered, and enslaved the populace. I think it would be one thing if my history classes had taught the truth rather than the myth of the basically empty continent with a few helpful natives that wished only to serve the clearly superior white "explorers" and "settlers." Helpful hint: all those settlers were really an invading army that committed genocide to gain control of the land and its resources.

Sorry. The point is that once I had a few days away from all that, I was crazy relaxed. Upon our return to Florida we stayed in Miami Beach for another five days, and while I shared some pictures on FB, I remained essentially unplugged. There was plenty of lounging and swimming and sightseeing, but I think what really relaxed me was being unplugged. I suspect this because as soon as I got onto the plane from Miami to Denver and then home, my shoulders tensed up.

Once home my nice relaxed mood began to fade. So, I culled the list of pages I followed to friends, redheads, and cats. That helped, but not enough. So when we went over the test results I jumped at it. But many anti-depressants just need time to saturate your body. Once I started feeling better, I tried following the Alt National Park page. I stopped around three weeks later. *shrug* I don't know if it's the best response for the continuance of this nation or humanity's survival. I don't know if really I should be concerned about either of those things. Nations and empires rise and fall. Species live and die, sometimes with catastrophic consequences. But I do know that my focus on terrible events that I could do nothing to affect was literally killing me.

Which brings us to more-or-less today. I started the new meds mid-December. I started this blog at the end of January. I grew my beard and moustaches out gloriously.

I got a new Casper mattress, I cleaned out (almost) all of the stuff that had been accumulating, I began putting time into various media (the 2005 series of Dr. Who, the video game The Witcher, The BBC show Merlin, various books I've wanted to read), building a new character for our new D&D campaign, Slylock Noir, and I'm now in the process of building a small wardrobe for my new alter ego "Professor Kittendad."

...who suffered a tragic beard-trimming incident.

I'm also working on a big project at work that requires a lot more mental energy than "paint the room tan," so even there I'm more engaged. All in all it's gotten busy for me in a good way, because I'm not accustomed to having this much energy and motivation, and I don't know how long it will last so I'm doing everything at once and using run-on sentences.

So there it is. I think that pretty well covers it. I will try to post here more frequently, not just for you my faithful readers but also for myself. i want to stay engaged and I want to chronicle my journey. So much of my life has passed that I can't account for (because chemo brain, grr) and I don't want to turn 50 and have only a hazy idea of how I spent the last decade.

I am big. It's the pictures that got small.

Now on websites near you

February 13, 2018 by Daniel Kerr

I've added a section called "Slylock Noir." Clicky above, between Blog and About, for more info.

I think we made a new friend.

February 06, 2018 by Daniel Kerr

When I was young I, like my father before me, was allergic to walnuts. It wasn’t serious, just numbness and tingling in the mouth. I’m not sure when it changed but I can eat them now. There’s a lovely prepared salad at Fred Meyer (the local branch of Kroger) that has cranberries and glazed walnuts and I think a raspberry vinaigrette. I’m trying to snack healthier so when I bought some pecans and cashews at WinCo, I got a bag of walnuts as well.

The operative word in the previous paragraph is “glazed.”

These things taste like wood. It’s like chewing on a branch but softer.. I don’t know, maybe I got an off batch? Regardless, I found them inedible.

What do you do with a chubby squirrel? earl-eye in the morning

But this little guy didn’t. So now every afternoon before I go to work I scatter walnut pieces for him on the balcony, and leave the drapes open so Azunyan can watch. In completely separate news, she’s stopped snuggling with me while I’m drinking my coffee and browsing the Net before breakfast. I have no idea why. 😜

I also have a bit of housekeeping here. A friend wanted to leave a comment here, but it asked her to sign in or something, but wouldn’t let her? If anybody else having this issue, please leave me a comment.

Ain't I the dickens?. Comment on FB or text me. I want to witness the firepower of this fully armed and operational blog. Thanks!

And now for some advice from The Postal Service that I just can't quite seem to heed:

Your heart won't heal right if you keep tearing out the sutures.